The Fruit of the Parent

The image is of two red and yellow hands holding each other above two red and yellow hands reaching for each other. Between the bottom two hands is a outline of a yellow dove/ All of this is on a blue background above the text, "LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR" on a orange background.

Presented to the First Congregational Church of Salem, NH on May 9, 2021

I would like to begin today by saying Happy Mother’s Day to all of you who are with us in person and online. To all of you who have given birth and those who have chosen to adopt children. To all the single mothers and the mothers who have a partner. To all of you who have at some point fulfilled the beautiful role of motherhood for a friend, a nephew, or a sibling. To all of you who reveal God’s love as a mother. But that is one of the difficulties of today – today as we become more inclusive and celebrate the breath of motherhood, we realize that the definition of this blessed calling is not so clear. We can no longer clearly define the mother as the definitive biological female who gives birth and raises children. Rather, the calling of a mother has become the person in our life who fulfills many roles. Yes, the people who fulfill these roles can be the biological female in our family; but they may also be one of the biological females, the biological male, or an older niece. So yes, this new reality of inclusivity we are living in today becomes difficult when we wish to honor and celebrate certain people in our life who believe in us – care for us – love us regardless of what we do – the people like our mothers on this Mother’s Day. 

Yet, I believe in all my heart that this difficulty is only because we are still struggling with the gender schisms of the past. Therefore, we are having a hard time accepting the loving fruit that God, our Parent, has and is providing us in the kin-dom to come.

Before we continue, would you pray with me:

Mothering God who reveals love. Invoke in us your divine love once more – teach us through our mothers – and guide us through the Spirit how to love one another as you have, do now, and will forever love us – Your beloved children. May the words spoken today share Your Love and the meditations on all our hearts be pleasing to You God. 

Now beloved these gender schisms I am speaking about today are built right into our societal structures, as old as Aristotle who around 350 BC distinguished between the public sphere as that of citizens, or men, in control of society and the private sphere which included slaves, women, and families. Basically, he defined the gender roles of men and women with the expectation that all women were mothers who worked inside the home, subservient to men. And we have all heard this theory in some shape or form. Furthermore, I assume, and it is my assumption, that some people have enjoyed this structure and others feel oppressed by this societal construct. Either way though, this societal framework has remained in place for thousands of years. Remained in place and created days like today. Days where we have traditionally celebrated our mothers in an exclusive fashion as the women who bear children and take care of the home. 

Yet not all mothers today give birth, work inside the home, or are even biologically female. Our perception of motherhood has grown to become more inclusive than Aristotle’s finite definitions of gender roles which is creating difficulties throughout society. Because change is always difficult, especially changing our perception of who we are lovingly called to celebrate on this day when the very concept of mothers is so ingrained into every aspect of our society. Yet changing who we are called to love into a more inclusive way is not new either. 

For Jesus in our continued reading from the Gospel according to John, reiterates his second commandment: “love one another.” The recurrence of this commandment which appears in all four Gospels reveals how important these words are for all of us to understand. Along with the importance we discussed last week, we must also remember the context of this important last speech. For, Jesus is speaking to his disciples who are Jewish in a Roman society full of schisms, divisions, and exclusions. These separations can be understood as the spheres of influence which separate the Jewish from the Romans – the citizens from the slaves – the men from the women. Leaving each person as part of an exclusive sphere within the greater society. These spheres or defined roles which people inhabited did not allow for upward progression – you could not be born Jewish and become a citizen – you could not be a woman and become part of the military. Each person either remained in their role or fell to a lower place on the societal scale. 

In many ways, we still feel the divisiveness of these spheres today. Today, when women are treated like objects – when women are paid less for the same occupation – or even when we expect a biological female to become a mother in order to be a valuable member of society. These gender roles and spheres are a hold-over from the Roman culture which perpetuated an exclusionary oppression on nearly everyone. Yet, Jesus’ words in this culture full of divisions were not spoken to the oppressors but to those who are oppressed. And to these souls, Jesus reveals the Good News. 

The Good News that the oppressed, the disciples, all disciples even us today are called to love one another. Jesus invites us to this love – this loving of one another without saying who the other one is – without putting disclaimers that he is only speaking about the disciples – without referring to only the people in one particular sphere; rather, Jesus simply says, “love one another” – love thy neighbor. Now, this may not seem to be profound for us here in Salem, New Hampshire as many of us have never felt oppression to this degree. But in the Roman culture where hate, exclusion, and oppression were commonplace it was an extremely profound change for Jesus to ask people who were already feeling oppressed -to love one another. This point is enhanced when Jesus says you are no longer servants, or slaves; but you are now my friends and the beloved of God as long as you do what I command. Beloved, do you see now what Jesus has done in this culture of exclusivity. He changed the world to lovingly include all the disciples – all people – all of us as part of the same sphere – the beloved friends of Jesus – equal to one another as long as we love one another. This commandment is the Good News, a calling to the oppressed, and the inclusive Way to the kin-dom.

But like I said, here in Salem on this blessed day where we celebrate mothers, this Good News may not seem profound. For our doctrine is love and we believe all are welcome no matter who they are or where they are on life’s journey. But I wonder – I wonder would everyone here love another so much that they would sacrifice for another person. Sacrifice for not only our family as motherhood has often revealed; but love the other side – the enemy – our actual oppressor enough to sacrifice for them? That is the true depth of what Jesus is calling us to do – to love each and every person so much that you would be willing to sacrifice everything; so, they may be included – welcomed – loved by God. 

Sacrifice though does not always include our lives and I pray that none of you are ever called to that cost of love – the love revealed in Jesus. Yet, this love does require a willingness to sacrifice. And sacrifice can be as simple as giving up those traditional gender norms to allow ourselves to become more inclusive and welcoming to all people. It could mean sacrificing the territorial feelings some people have that Mother’s Day is only for biological females who are homemakers in order to celebrate the thousands of ways motherhood has enhanced all our lives. It could mean sacrificing part of the day; so, your daughter may celebrate Mother’s Day with her new boyfriend’s mother, or your son may celebrate Mother’s Day with his wife. It could mean sacrificing our preconceived notions that the mother and child are ethnically the same or that there is a biological female in the family. It could mean sacrificing our societal standards built on thousands of years of oppression in order to witness the fruit of inclusive Love which God is calling us too in the kin-dom. It could even mean sacrificing a relationship with someone who is oppressive in order to love one another from a distance. That beloved is the depth of what Jesus is asking us to do when he says, “love one another.” Love one another enough to sacrifice for another person; so, we may all experience the inclusive loving fruit of the Parent in the kin-dom to come. May you never have to, but always willing to, sacrifice for another; so, all people may witness the inclusive Love in the kin-dom of God. Amen.